


Cramming it in Krampus

by bonkerzevil



Category: Dangan Ronpa - All Media Types, New Dangan Ronpa V3: Everyone's New Semester of Killing
Genre: AUGH, Christmas, Crack, Drugs, FUCK UOU, Horrible Puns, Krampus AU, M/M, Recreational Drug Use, References to Drugs, Weed, and shuichi fucks. krampus. also known as kokichi, shuichi smokes weed, this is based off a christmas song on tiktok by emojoseph, yes. kokichi is in fact krampus
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-25
Updated: 2020-12-25
Packaged: 2021-03-10 17:13:34
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 355
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28310688
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bonkerzevil/pseuds/bonkerzevil
Summary: Kokichi is krampus and Shuichi fucks him. what the fuck else can i fukin say.
Relationships: Oma Kokichi/Saihara Shuichi
Comments: 5
Kudos: 16





	Cramming it in Krampus

**Author's Note:**

> i have a breakdown at the fukin end ofbtjis

Shuichi kinda expected not gettin shit frum ol saint nick this year. He hasn't been a very good boy this year.  
  
U kno.  
  
wokin too much smeed. Gettin too many ciggys frum the ye old gas station mart. Santa aint give shit 2 druggos.  
  
no way jose.  
  
Mr shumai decided to wander down his stairs just for da shitz n giggles. Nuffin under the tree.  
  
DAMN FATASS SANTA.  
  
He decided to jiggy down to his lonely lil stockin hangin from his lonely lil fireplace. When he fisted it, he found nuffin but a little pink heart shaped note.  
  
"Meet me on the roof~ 🤍"  
  
Shuichi's detective gland jiggled.  
  
"How mysterious......"  
  
He scuttled up his stairs to the rooftop. To his surprise, waiting there with his big ol hooves wuz nopony but kokrampus himself!  
  
He got down on his hands and knees n said,  
  
"this iz yer pwesent, shumai ! do as u pwease🤍"  
  
Shuichi considers his options.  
  
Now if he were to stick it in saint nick... right here... on his rooftop..... his dicky wicky would most definitely freeze.  
but on the other hand.... he aint got sum ass in a fukkin WHILE mah man !  
  
"Eh. worth a shot."  
  
he shoves his man meat into kokrampuses gob full force.  
"I'LL GIVE U A BUNCHA KIDS TO GOBBLE UP!"  
  
He shimmied his gift over n over into kokichi krampus's mouth.  
  
"Santa only comes once a year~~~ but i m coming 7!! AAAUGH~!🤍"  
  
"I'm makin u mah ho ho ho ;)"  
  
"OOOH YES SHUMAI !"  
  
"This is NOT gunna be one silent night."  
  
"SHOOT YER CHRISTMASY GOO"  
blarrrdgh  
fuck you i give up on this  
goddamit  
wht the fuck  
i m writing this at 11:52 pm on christmas fukin eve. i only wrappd 2 fukin presents and instead i m doin this shit.  
FUCK !  
I CAN T BELIEVE THIS IS SERIOUSLY THE FIRST DANGANRONPA FIC I VE KINDA FINISHED WRITING SINCE 2017. WAHT THE FUCK.  
UGH.  
i got on writing a whole multi work saiouma au this summer that i just. gave up on cuz i got all lazy. DAMN YOU !!!!!!! DAM YOUUUUUU !!!!!  
i ll get om it one day....

**Author's Note:**

> wooh  
> fuck you


End file.
